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Storage Wars Characters

Further thoughts on Storage War’s characters found here.

On Wednesday when the new Storage Wars airs my blog traffic goes through the roof. If you don’t watch the show, it’s on from 10-11 and is a bidding game on storage lockers. Here are some thoughts on the characters.

Jarrod and Brandi Schultz

I’ve already wrote about how Brandi is the best looking person on the show and she is seemingly getting hotter by the week. She stays skinny, has a nice rack and a pretty face. The relationship between the two is kind of unique as they seem to “put up” with one another. I just want to point out if you watched tonight’s episode when Jarrod dropped the boxes on Brandi. His attitude of I didn’t drop the boxes on you, they just fell on you is complete garbage. He can easily avoid any confrontation by saying he’s sorry instead of it wasn’t his fault. I like how Brandi acts all prissy and won’t search through garbage. These two will make just as much money from the publicity as they make from the units on the show.

Barry

Barry is growing on me. He’s sort of eccentric and can take a joke. He is willing to spend money on a units potential and he seems to find the most bizarre items. His rivalry with Mark and how intense he gets makes me like him even more. He actually has personality and is good for the show. His gloves and the wild cars he drives should show you that he needs to be different.

Darrell & Brandon Sheets

Easily the worst character on the show. Not his son, but Darrell is constantly talking shit and always walking away from the auction with nothing. Talks the talk, doesn’t walk the walk. He comes off as thinking he is always outsmarting people but is really just too much of a pussy to bid on units. He’s too tight to the vest and should leave the show.

Dave Hester

YEEEEEEUUUUPPPPPP! I really find Dave to be the wisest and most willing to spend cash for lockers that have potential. He seems to make out on almost every unit and he doesn’t get involved in the bidding until the end. Basically he waits to see what people are willing to pay and than he jumps in. The way he needles Jarrod and Barry is great. He’s low key and seems to win. I like his style on the show.

Mark

He’s great for the show. He has cash behind him. He’s willing to spend. He bids up the units to irritate the characters. He’s probably not always paying the best price for the lockers but he makes it interesting. Plus I was happy the way he got down and dirty when he was going through the locker. The fact he thought a Nintendo was worth 13,000 and it was only 10 should say something about his ability to spot deals.

By |2016-11-01T23:38:41-04:00August 10th, 2011|Tv|5 Comments

Top 5 Best Hbo Characters

Shows on HBO are generally my favorite and they usually include a few characters who stand out above the rest. Usually they offer comic relief or are just badass. Here is my list of my favorite characters in HBO Series.

Stevie Janowski – Eastbound and Down


Eastbound and Down is a pretty average show. The first season was far and away better than the second but Stevie is the stand out star. His misguided loyalty to Kenny is awesome to watch. He just nails this role as the dedicated, copycat servant to Kenny. I have a hard time really describing why I like him so much but if you watch the show you learn to appreciate Stevie.

Stevie: You know what I wish? I wish I could just hang around you all the time, and just do whatever you do, and just like, learn from you, and aide you.

Stevie: “This is awesome, you can totally see straight through the butthole right into the pussy, man. That is awesome.
Kenny Powers: Yeah, man. I don’t think those two things are connected.”

Lord Petyr Baelish AKA Littlefinger – Game of Thrones
Aidan Gillen

I would guess most people haven’t watched this show but this is the same actor, Aidan Gillen, who played Mayor Carcetti on the Wire who was also awesome. I’m just starting the 3rd Game of Thrones Book and his character in the book is deceptive and wily and Gillen does a great job at portraying this.

Murray Hewitt – Flight of the Conchords

Played by Rhys Darby and one of the funniest characters ever in my opinion. I really liked this show and was going to put Dave up here but I think I have to give Murray the edge. His acting is perfect because he doesn’t know he’s being moronic. Everything Murray says has purpose and it always is a little off. The show does a great job of showing how a foreign culture fits into America with hilarious humor.

Bret: It’s a chicken egg situation.
Murray: What does he mean, chicken?
Jemaine: Well, you know, what came first the chicken or the egg?
Murray: Well, that’s irrelevant, isn’t it? Stupid. The chicken, obviously.
Bret: Well, then where’d the chicken come from?
Murray: Well it came from the – oh.
Bret: Yeah, see, the egg.
Murray: You’re the egg. You’re a bad egg. You’ve derailed this meeting with another obscure comment.

Marty Funkhouser – Curb Your Enthusiasm

Played by Bob Einstein, who was Super Dave, the Funk wasn’t even in the show till season 4. However, his dry, monotone humor is hilarious. The episode just a few weeks ago with him wearing the yamaka had me on the floor. I feel like he’s just always capable of something humorous.

Marty – You sit down to pee? Do you shit standing up?

Marty – We were trying to recreate what happened 25 years ago, and I said ‘Larry would you like to make a toast?’ and someone said ‘Larry went home to take a shit.’

Jr – The Sopranos

Corrado John Soprano, Jr is played by Dominic Chianese. I’m just about finished season 3 with the Sopranos but I’m constantly amused by Uncle Jun. The way he’s always yelling at the fat guy Bakula and using great racial comments. For an old guy he has a lot of vigor. I just think he is a great actor and I find the character extremely well played.

Junior: Some people are so far behind in the race that they actually believe they’re leading.
Junior: You heard about the Chinese godfather? He made them an offer they couldn’t understand.


Some other obvious good ones I left out were Omar from the Wire, Eric from True Blood, and Ari from Entourage.

By |2016-11-01T23:31:54-04:00August 9th, 2011|Tv|1 Comment

Jersey Shore Italy

I figured I’d take a minute after watching the episode to give some thoughts. Snookie is looking half decent after the weight she lost. Seeing her become a health nut is sort of unusual. JWoww looks like an alien. I think Roger has her working out too much or something. I thought Sammi looks pretty good and was pretty normal for the episode. Deena’s face looks like butt. The Pauly/Vinny bromance is gay and over the top. Ronnie is an alcoholic and Situation is going to get his ass kicked.

The episode was really lame by the way. I think they have a horrible thing going with the fact that they can’t speak to the locals. Watching the gang dance amongst themselves is really boring. The Situation/Snookie connection came out of nowhere and the fight that ensues should make for good drama. Aside from that the show was horrible. If you watched this show for the first time you’d never watch again. Unfortunately, I have nothing better to do.

By |2016-11-01T23:31:36-04:00August 4th, 2011|Tv|0 Comments

Brandi from Storage Wars

New Storage Wars aired tonight and Brandi is looking good. Since she’s the only female, and I explained why she’s hotter than ever here and here, she stands out head and shoulders above the crowd. Plus she actually has a pulse behind her. She’s hotter than you’d think because she acts like a real person. It’s not like she knows she’s attractive and acts like Paris or Kim K. She is just there as a normal human being bidding on storage lockers. She really is my perfect girl though. I love the brunette/blond hair color and she has a cute face and a fine body. She just feels like she’d be fun to be around.

I think the show is starting to get a bit too much mainstream. When they just start bidding up the prices for TV, it loses it’s realness. Plus they seem to value everything in excess just to keep it interesting. Just because they say it’s this much doesn’t mean anyone would pay that much. I expect this is the last season this show will be any good. In the meantime, here are some Brandi pics to keep you interested.

By |2013-03-15T03:30:56-04:00August 3rd, 2011|Celeb, Tv|15 Comments

HBOGo Review

I was quite annoyed trying to get hooked up with HBOGo because when the Comcast account got put in my name, all of the usernames were still Evan’s. I had to call them and try to change it but they weren’t letting me because they needed to send a pin to our landline (we got a phone to get a better deal) which isn’t hooked up. Since I couldn’t get it, they said they’d have to mail it which didn’t please me. Fortunately I knew Evan’s favorite animal’s name and was able to log in as him and switch my password which got me access to HBOGo.

This turned out to be wonderful timing because I’ve been watching the Soprano’s on DVD and only got through 2 seasons. Now I have every season on HBOGo and will never have to spend another dime. Plus they have all episodes from EVERY series. Game of Thrones, the Wire, even Flight of the Conchords. Now I get a chance to watch 6 Feet Under for no cost (aside from my subscription). Not only do they give you access to series but also movies, documentaries, and their Late Night Programs. Now that I’m an adult, I didn’t even feel guilty about what they had on there. I don’t care much for their reality sex shows like Cathouse, Katie Morgan, and Real Sex but I saw they had a few of their softcore movies which I checked out. Alien Sex Files 3 was extremely boring and all the colors were a bit funky. The quality was better than what you find on spankwire but the action is just lame. The girl fake moans and I can’t get over the fact that it’s acting to enjoy it, although the Alien Housewife was pretty hot but after one scene there isn’t much more she has to offer. They should be using a different girl every scene for variety. I haven’t watched a softcore porn scene in years by the way and can say frankly that the what’s on the internet is better.

In terms of quality, it is watchable. It’s not as good as DVD but I wasn’t too thrown off when I watched a few episodes of Sopranos. I’m sure it depends on your graphic card as well. The sound is good and it fits nicely widescreen on my 23″ monitor. If you don’t have HBO, HBOGo should be reason enough to get it. There is hours upon hours of entertainment on it. Just the fact that you can catch up on awesome series is enough to make you subscribe. I give this 2 thumbs way up.

By |2016-11-01T23:35:43-04:00August 3rd, 2011|Tv|3 Comments

My genuine dislike for Turtle

Notice I don’t say “my genuine dislike for Jerry Ferrara“. He recently lost 55 pounds and it’s quite apparent in the picture below. He claims it’s done just by his diet but he looks a little more ripped than just eating healthier. I’m sure Jerry is a stand-up guy who is just enjoying the fame from Entourage. What they’ve done to Turtle’s character is atrocious. To think that he’s running the Avion business with all those hot girls around just seems so out of place. The fact that he was with Jamie Lynn Sigler and now this Alex girl (and the hot college girl from last year) is far-fetched. I don’t know what it is but the producers tried to evolve Turtle’s character and they should just have kept him as an errand boy for Vince. His rap storyline with Saigon seemed the most realistic for him. Now he’s skinny Turtle instead of fat Turtle and his story lines are just awkward. Just my thoughts.

By |2013-03-15T03:40:57-04:00August 1st, 2011|Tv|3 Comments

Jersey Shore Italy

Here’s a trailer from the new season. I wasn’t going to post anything about this when I watched it but the ending of that trailer made me. I don’t care what people say about that show, this isn’t acting. Yes there are tons of falsehoods about the show and calling it reality TV is a joke, but what these “characters” do is real. Seeing Snookie work out should also show what kind of perception there is about becoming famous and what famous people should look like.

By |2016-11-01T23:37:03-04:00July 31st, 2011|Tv|0 Comments

The social assassin

I’m going to tie some current events in my life with HBO’s Sunday night line up. I’ll start by saying that True Blood is pretty wacky and this hasn’t been one of the better seasons so far. The Arlene/baby storyline is dumb. Lafayette and his boyfriend bore me. Tara sucks. Jason’s panther thing is far out and Jessica and Hoyt thing is just weird at this point. The Merlotte’s are moderately amusing. The Sookie/Eric thing is OK and I will say I’m really looking forward to Bill finding Eric with Sookie.

I thought Curb was hilarious. Easily the best episode of the season. Funkhauser and the yamaka was hilarious. I thought When Jeff said the pillow looked like a cat and they were concocting evil plans was really funny. The social assassin thing had me cracking up because I feel like I’ve become one myself. It’s just extremely difficult to please everyone because everyone looks at things differently. People base their viewpoints on “facts” that are apparent to them and that can be seen differently by someone else. Truth is very unique in the sense that there can be a number of different truths. What I am learning though is it’s just better to just shut up and only worry about yourself. Interfering with people just isn’t worth it. Letting people believe in their own “truth” and going along with it is far superior than making a fuss about it.

I thought Entourage was decent too. People expect the world from that show and are always disappointed. I found this season opener to be very realistic. I thought the way that the group was handling Vince’s situation is probably very common to people coming out of rehab. They try to shelter him from any vice and in turn just make things “weird”. The Ari/Mrs. Ari is another common real life situation that I think is neat to watch how they show Ari taking it. I also found it unbelievable that Perrey Reeves character doesn’t even have a name other than Mrs. Ari. I think people just want this show to make them orgasm with every episode. Even though it’s a short season, I’ll still happily watch this show and not freak out when the episode is only decent. I hate Scott’s character by the way.

By |2016-11-01T23:36:30-04:00July 24th, 2011|Tv|0 Comments

Jersey Shore “Cabs are Here”

I only have created one Jersey Shore episode post but Amber said she thought it was an entertaining read so I try to write about what people want. For the first time I actually side with Sammi and applaud her decision to leave. Honestly, is Ron a complete moron? He must live on Mars because he is so out of touch with reality. I love how he said Sammi disrespected him by dancing with that guy when he was 10 feet away. At least when he was getting with chicks it was different because, “SHE WASN’T THERE”. I liked the insult of calling him a psycho because that was pretty accurate although his “useless, spoiled bitch” was just as good. Watching him whimpering after what he just did to her room and how he treated her, then at the end he is wondering why she is leaving, like seriously, if he thinks you treat people like that and they are going to stay with you, he’s dreaming. I thought the way Sammi went to the bar was awesome and I had a complete turn-around on my opinion of her. I really think she made Ron look like an idiot throughout the whole episode. Even though she hangs on every little thing of the past, which would be so annoying, I like the way she manipulates the show. She’ll be back.

Just some other highlights. When Ron was confronting Mike and it was getting heated, I thought to myself “just apologize to shut him up whether you believe it or not.” Mike was smart enough to do so which I was happy to see because apologizing is just the smartest way to avoid meaningless situations. He’s not called the Situation for nothing. Pauly calling it a “voodoo trick” Mike used was good too. Pauly had his moments when he was getting too distracted to clean his sneaks and when Ron and Mike were arguing his eyes were just completely bulging out of his head. Also, the more Deena is on the show, the more I just wish she wasn’t there. Absolutely awful casting by MTV and it’s not her fault, but just get someone better. The JWoWW – Roger thing is sort of boring but she did look pretty hot in her S & M gear.

By |2016-10-28T15:57:00-04:00February 11th, 2011|Tv|0 Comments

Jersey Shore

I actually liked the episode. The human behavior is fascinating. I also love how MTV promotes “Skins” non-stop. I know I’m probably out of their age bracket but I have completely no interest in a fictional show about relationships. However the reason I think the Jersey Shore is so good is because it’s real. Do you think it’s possible to stage how hammered Nicole was? Those actions are completely out of her control, I know, I’ve been there. Can they stage how mad Ronnie gets at Sammi because if so the guy deserves an Emmy. My point is that as loco and trashy as this show is, the situation is so bizarre that these people have no choice but to get too hammered because the actual reality of it is unbearable. These people live a tough life in the spotlight with camera’s 24/7. How hard is that to do?

Just a few parts I found hilarious of the episode. When the guy was talking to JWoww and the girl told JWoww he had a boyfriend and then he starts getting pissed and she retorted with “you’re just pissed because I’m blowing up your spot.” She was right though because he was getting way to mad if it weren’t true.

The Sammi forgiving part is such hilarity too. First off she’s a complete schemer in this Reality Television. She his obviously the character who is doing the most crafting and manipulating to make great TV. She’s a reality TV professional. Now that she thought that Ronnie was going to abandon her she knew she needed friends, so she had to start apologizing to get some people back on her side. Personally if I were Snooki I’d forgive her too because the whole situation should just be viewed as a phase instead of an eternity. The forgiveness to Deena was easy for Sammi because she barely knew her so Sammi just weaseled her way through that. The JWoww gets even better because they are both stone set in it not happening. My guess is they eventually talk it out somewhere down the line. If not, it’s so petty it makes girls look bad.

The other stalker scene was strange and that girl really must be off the deep end. Pauly seems like a pretty likable guy and I’m guessing she’s just a psycho and we should be on alert for any crazy shit she may try to pull. Mike’s girl was definitely hot and an obvious good pull. Not quite as good as Vinnie’s who he just stuck it in and said see ya later without any emotion or drama. His character has really matured since the first season. His laugh impressions of Ronnie were first class and hysterical.

I know if you don’t watch the Jersey Shore than you just think this is a complete wasted post and you have no interest. If you read this far and you have absolutely no interest then you are a really dedicated reader because I would have thought you quit after paragraph one. I also want to point out that when I post songs By Britney Spears, it’s not that I’m sitting here playing this song on repeat. The way to start a blog that people actually caring about is writing about things that people actually care about. Meaning the most popular things out there (ie, most dl’d song on Itunes and the Jersey Shore which is MTV’s highest rated show and probably is saving their network.) aren’t necessarily my favorite but its good to know what’s out there.

By |2013-03-15T17:47:52-04:00January 17th, 2011|Tv|0 Comments
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