Some Kid’s Dunkin Trip

Line at DunkinAt my  Dunkin today the line was out the door.  I’d guess maybe 12 people in line ahead of me but the line moves pretty quickly so I was going to wait.  Exactly 2 people ahead of me was a man and a pregnant woman and their 2 year old kid.  I have no idea if he was 2 but he could walk and seemed somewhat coherent.  When the line is out the door you expect the people already in line to do their best making room so people don’t have to wait outside.  This couple showed no understanding of this simple courtesy and the kid was running wild and the gap between them and the person in front could fit a 747.  I was on the shoulders of the woman in front of me.

The couple ordered their kid a doughnut and he was incredibly happy.  The man was waiting for his egg and cheese croissant while I was waiting for my cinnamon raisin bagel.  I was completely up against the wall and the kid was standing next to his dad.  When his dad said it was time to leave the kid is holding his doughnut and walking directly in front of me.  I was seriously curious how developed this kid’s motor skills were and how he was going to make the turn out the door.

As you can see from the picture, I was completely still as he was making his turn.  Well wouldn’t you know, he clipped my shoe and fell straight to the ground with his doughnut flying right out the open exit door and onto the cement.  I was looking straight ahead because this experiment did not involve me to do anything but stand.  Once I looked down I saw this kid face down, crying, and I started cracking up.  I wasn’t sure if I should have helped him up or what but I was hysterical.  I started to feel bad for a split second and then started thinking that the world evens itself out.  If you don’t let people wait inside, your kid is going to trip.

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Boxers or Briefs?

There is a lack of demand for 100% cotton, knit boxers nowadays. Back in High School I owned 3 pairs of tighty-whiteys and the only, and I mean only, reason I wore them was for track meets. I refused to be Jon Ragen whose boxers were lower than the short shorts. I have no interest in my cock and balls not having any breathing room. I’m a boxer man.

414bzqpwv1LBoxers at department stores still exist but they are always the woven kind. The woven kind is this too hard fabric which is extremely uncomfortable and I’d much rather free ball if it came down to that.  Woven is like having sand paper scratch your dick while you walk.  My preference is the 100% cotton, knit seen boxer to the right.

Boxers vs BriefsThis leads me into what I purchased from Amazon because I’ve seen them everywhere. If you walk around a Macy’s there are 0 pair of what I’m looking for and hundreds of pairs of tighty whiteys and boxer briefs. Due to the lack of supply and my desire to keep an open mind, I purchased some Hugo Boss boxer briefs.

I honestly feel suffocated. My johnson can’t breathe and is shrinking smaller than normal. When I have boxers on I hang dong. This feels humiliating and emasculating. I also feel my sperm count lowering and my farts sticking to my skin.  With all of these negatives, I will still give these a try because I spent 20 dollars on 3 pairs and the elastic on my old boxers are starting to wear out and that’s far worse. There may even have to be a part two to this underwear conundrum because I can tell it’s riveting material.

I Suck at Writing

tcA lightning bolt must have struck me right in the forehead and it electrified a light bulb right above my head because it just lit up. I’m not deleting that last line because that’s what I came up with when trying to explain how a light bulb went off in my brain. If that’s not telling I can’t explain it better. Or worse.

You can also tell I quit pretty easily and don’t give a fuck about quality. I took that picture from images and loaded it in PhotoShop, grabbed a terrible picture of my head, contorted in every direction so it was completely mismatched, then I said I don’t give a fuck about how it looks my audience doesn’t either. This should demonstrate my commitment to quality.

Because+fuck+you+that+s+why_e8d2c8_3062569It’s fairly obvious that after 5+ years of doing this, I’m not that talented as a writer. Sure I scrape by but if this was my full time job, I’d be alongside the one legged man on 8th and 76 intersection begging for pennies. I make little effort of improving which is the worst part about it because I actually do make effort to improve aside from taking an English class and being that old dude learning to write for his blog which has an annual revenue of 0. It’s like, “dude, blog’s about your shitty life have no relevance or educational value to society so be happy no one tells you to shut it down.” That’s what Mr. Wonderful would say.

What’s worse is that I find myself right-click saving any gif or pic of interest just to make it look like I’m still here. I’ll go to Reddit with the pure intention of finding the first clip that I think other people might enjoy. It’s fine but there is no emotion behind it. This blog was always fun for me but I’m starting to suck at it.

This could only be a phase but I wanted to check in and say I’m still here and will find some inspiration somewhere but it could take some time before these ideas have resonated (I hate this word by the way) within me.

Green Screen at Work

I was focused in on the gymnast who made the long leap to the left and even after grabbing on to the ledge at that jumping distance, he was unable to pull himself up. Mind boggling.

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TC’s Takes on Topics

I wanted to tackle a few topics that are universal to each and every person roaming the globe. Understand that I have zero interest discussing this in person so if you see me in the real world, ask me how much I hate the smell of a sponge that washes dirty plates instead of these.

wealth-gap-2Money – A topic that everyone must contend with because without it, you have better be one hell of a survivalist. Imagine Earth before man existed on it with pure blue water, growing trees and plants, nature lizards (just lizards), and oxygen to sustain life. Resources from the ground were abundant. When man arrived, resources were needed to survive. Money is only the intermediary between the trade of resources. Instead of trading you a goat for your lumber, money is a universal medium for trading goods. It simplifies trading. So most people look to making more money as a plus because it gives access to more resources. This is why the cliche statement, “money doesn’t buy happiness” rings true. Money only buys resources, not happiness.

National-Geographic-Magazine-illustre-le-monde-en-video-7-Billion-4[1]People – With 7 billion people in the world, it’s hard to view yourself as unique. The ratio of 1/7,000,000,000 gives a much better understanding of how inconsequential you are. Everyone you interact with is another one. It’s easy to view people as your best friend or I went to school with them but reality is that it’s only a single person who you may interact with in a small glimpse of time in your life. There are of course life long friends but it’s rare and viewing people this way is a varying opinion than believing that everyone is special.

quote-there-is-something-fundamentally-unfair-about-a-government-that-takes-away-so-much-of-people-s-steve-forbes-63660Government – The top 1% of the world possess 40% of the world’s wealth. This wealth has heavy influence on the Gov’t. When the rich have this much money, they strike deals with the Gov’t in order to make their world tick the way they want so that they can continue being so wealthy and powerful.

Small players have no power whatsoever and it’s sickening to think that you are powerless against the Gov’t. This is why getting hyped up in politics is as smart as banging your head into a wall. The flip side is doing nothing and accepting that this is the way it is. There is no good answer unless the lower class pull together and start a revolution demanding change. It would be bloody and no good would come from it.

19053Death – No one know what happens when you die but death is a part of life. A cat of the family has passed recently and he had a lifespan of around 15 years. He had bad breath. Now that he has passed, it’s foolish to think that his trait of bad breath was disgusting. You take his life as an all encompassing 15 year journey instead of a day to day event and realize how much love the cat gave and the joy he brought into our lives. Death is sad. Some people can understand it’s part of the life cycle and inevitable and others can’t. This thought will usually lead to afterlife discussion and the hope that the dead are not really dead. This is hard to grasp.

I know very little about the last 4 topics I wrote about.  I don’t have Mark Cuban money.  I only interact with dozens of people.  I barely know who the Vice President is.  I’m still living.  So why did I take the time to write about them when I know so little?  It’s to show that I have the ability to think.  This would never be a paper in college and no self respecting professor would pass it.  Yet this is the best representation of how I think.  This is an A paper from my mind.  There was no research (I looked up the wealth stat).  For that I’m 1% proud and 99% apathetic.  Do you think like this?

Where are the Updates?

blog-ideasFirst and foremost, I must apologize to the 12 people who check this blog daily. One half hearted update in 5 days is not a blog that is worth checking in to. I have reason for this though as I told myself I wasn’t going to waste my audience’s time with pointless posts about life that I barely care about so I wouldn’t expect you to. The posts, not my life.

I suppose you could say that over the past few days I’ve been doing much “research” (I have no idea why I used quotes or why this in parentheses other than because research is definitely not the right word I just don’t know what else to call it) for blog entries. I’ve been reading a book recommended to me about a scam artist, a book about a revolution, and a fair amount of Shark Tank shows that I’ll comment on when I finish the series. It’s also fair to say I’ve been very busy with work as the job has gotten more serious since our 1 week vacation for some inexplicable reason.

Hang in there though. I’ll have more posts shortly.

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How to Find Happiness

I was surfing around Reddit and stumbled upon a Calvin and Hobbes strip, which lead me to the /r page on calvinandhobbes and that led me to this insight from Bill Watterson. I’m probably the last person who should be showing this based on my job but I still like it.

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My New Haircut

I got a haircut yesterday.  Nick cut it.  He spent 12 minutes on my head.  It’s a little pricey at $18 plus tip (I give $22).

That’s all I’ve got.  Watch Terio get punched in the face.

The Ebola Apocalypse

Although the likelihood of the Ebola virus turning into the Bubonic plague is slim, it is certainly the talk of the town.  Deadly viruses are a complex beast because of the uncertainty and what precautions must be taken.  Here in America our media makes it seem like Ebola can be spread by talking to someone else when there have been a total of 2 documented cases.  This isn’t Africa where we are rubbing our wounds together.

6-thriller-michael-jacksonWith the popularity of all of these zombie shows, they make you think that the living dead is an actual possibility.  Who says it isn’t?  Some scientist may believe that this is impossible but if Michael Jackson in Thriller was actually staring you in the face, you might sing a different tune.  I know I’d be screwed if it were to happen.  I have no weapons and no survival skill-set.

I’m certainly not concerned quite yet about catching any deadly virus but I have been feeling a little odd.  I’m pretty sure everything is fine.  Here is a recent selfie I shot.  See you soon!

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