About Tom Stortz

Enjoying my last few responsibility free years left.

Not in the mood

I’m not in the mood to go into detail about what’s happening with my life. An intro sentence like that would make you think that there actually was something happening but in fact there’s really not that much going on. Friday was another too drunk night. Saturday we went to AC to watch the A10 tournament and do some gambling. For what it’s worth, you can’t go to “the pool” at 1:30 am on a Saturday due to a never before seen length of line. Yesterday I watched some hoops, watched taking back 123 pelham which I thought was somewhat entertaining but not fulfilling. I watched Training Day in full because I only watched it in bits and pieces. Then I watched the Reggie Miller 30 on 30 or whatever it was and found that to be more entertaining than the movies. All in all things are just very run of the mill for me right now. I also would like to note that sometimes I’ll use something like run of the mill which I believe means ordinary and usual but for how many times I actually use that expression it could mean something else. It’s ok to use words or phrases that you don’t know under one condition, the person or people you use it in front of don’t know either. Weather should be getting nicer and hopefully this Monday moves along.

By |2010-03-15T13:30:58-04:00March 15th, 2010|My Brain|3 Comments

12:40

I’m writing this drunk at 12:40 but everything i have to write is accurate and I’m backspacing anything that is incorrect. I always had a good impression of females, but tonight I’ve changed my tone. I was talking to a lady who went to Villanova and she was a nice girl. We talked for a couple minutes and then she asked to feel my muscle. I’m certainly not the biggest guy but after she felt it she backed away. I said what’s wrong and she gave no comment so I called her shallow. She negotiated with her friend for a minute and then she slapped me across the face. This is a good indicator of how girls think. I called her shallow because all she cared about was muscles, which I’m right, and she had the nerve to slap me. From now on I can’t look at another girl in a light that is good. If you have these kind of genders walking around, the make up has to be similar. I always thought it was kind of a joke that girls were irrational, illogical, and for what I’ve seen impractical, this is just the nature. It’s always going to be in the back of my mind that girls have a front and a bullshit way. From a guys opinion I will relate to a lot of I words.

* I just reread this this morning and I’m not going to edit anything even though the end seems to go off on a bit of tangent. My new goal in life is to think of as many words that start with I that describe females. Immoral, idiotic, improper, inferior, incapable, icy, impossible, and inconsiderate.

By |2010-03-12T10:40:52-05:00March 12th, 2010|My Brain|5 Comments

Overrated/Underrated

I want to go over various restaurants, actresses, musicians etc. who are overrated and underrated.

    Overrated

Kings of Leon – This isn’t a new group to the scene. They have made 4 albums over the past 7 or so years and the latest was the only one that produced hits. I agree wholeheartedly that Sex on Fire and Use Somebody are very good songs but I’ve listened to some of their earlier stuff and it’s not up to snuff. Decent band, lot of hype.

Angelina Jolie – I remember telling the Rock that in Tomb Raider her boobs were stuffed and he was in disbelief. Bottom line is that she’s just not that attractive. I find her acting to be average as well. She married Billy Bob which is a bizarre move and now adopts foreign ethnic babies for the fun of it. Strange character and I just don’t see the allure in her.

Jon and Kate – First off, I’ve seen the show a couple times and it just seems like a terrible show with a couple using their kids for fame. I’m happy the marriage didn’t work and I hope they both fade into oblivion. I know Kate is doing Dancing with the Stars which is bothersome because the only reason she’s famous is for popping 8 kids out of snatch. They’ve done nothing to deserve all the attention and they fall into the fame category with the hot air balloon gimmick people and the couple who got into the presidential dinner. I would also like to add that if it wasn’t for the Erin Andrews peep show, she’d never be on Dancing with the stars. That’s how it works ladies, show your goods and become famous.

Pizza Hut is vastly overrated in my mind. I think their pizza is too fluffy and the cheese is very average. I think I liked their cheese crust but anytime someone mentions how much they like Pizza Hut I cringe a little. I lived off of American beer and Domino’s for a year in college and I turned out all right so I may be a bit partial.

I’m going to write that Oakleys are overrated but I think sunglasses in general, as a fashion statement, are stupid. If you are driving in a sunny location, playing the outfield, or are going to the beach, I can see the need for sunglasses. What I don’t see is why people spend hundreds of dollars on sunglasses so they can wear them everywhere (inside?) because they think they look cooler. This was kind of off base of my overrated topic but I still wanted to point this out.

Nirvana and tool are bands that I never really thought were as amazing as everyone else. I’ve heard a fair amount of Nirvana’s songs and I just can’t hear anything mind blowingly spectacular. Smells like teen spirit, come as you are, lithium are all good songs but overrated in quality, probably due to the spectacle that was Kurt Cobain. And I haven’t listened to tool for any length of time but from what I have heard it is nothing I would want to hear again.

Subway has weak food. You ask a bunch of Indian’s to make you a regular, nothing special, hoagie and that’s what Subway is. The meatball sub is weak, their portions suck, their prices are bearable but not unbeatable. Nothing great here in my mind.

    Underrated

Arby’s curly fries are dynamite. Mixing them with Ketchup and I think you have the best fast food fry. I eat their chicken bacon Swiss and I think that’s a great sandwich as well. They have a wide array of choices on their menu and the price isn’t horrible. I don’t find them around the Philly area too much but I had it when I was in New Orleans and it reminded me of how I used to get it all the time in Pittsburgh.

Mac & Cheese is underrated because of it’s value and it’s taste. Wagon and I buy these giant trays of it at Sam’s club and it acts as an entire meal and it’s a rarity if we finish the entire tray in one sitting. Good product that I’ve liked throughout my entire life

People don’t know about Journey. They know about Don’t Stop Believing but that’s it. These guys can really break it down on guitar. I don’t know much about playing music but if you took their songs and translated them to guitar hero tracks, kids would be at a loss for how well Journey plays. Just the Same Way and Stone in Love are good songs most people don’t know about. They have a lot of shitty songs as well for what it’s worth.

A good wallet is underrated. If you have a beaten up old wallet it just shows that you aren’t used to carrying anything important (money, credit cards…) because you don’t have any respect for where you put the essentials. If you have holes in the wallet it is a good idea to upgrade so no mishaps occur. I don’t get the money clip by the way.

Bose headphones may run you a hundred bucks but if you use headphones on planes or tight places, it’s necessary to have headphones that don’t allow the music to carry out. I feel like most people just use the pair that came with the playing device but once you have a quality pair of headphones it’s hard to go back. I can thank my days of SOF2 for this understanding. You can’t run with the Bose Noise Cancellers which is an obvious drawback.

Elisha Cuthbert’s boobs are underrated, enough said.

The flash drive is a piece of technology that allows you transport data with ease. If you don’t own a flash drive, you either don’t understand the usefulness or you don’t do anything useful.

If you are a subway fan you disagree with this last one but I think Quizno’s makes a very good sandwich. I like how it gets toasted, I like the sauces, I like how it melts, I like the taste. Good in my book.

By |2010-03-11T00:17:05-05:00March 11th, 2010|Music, My Brain|0 Comments

Ms Montag

To keep in the same celeb theme and working off of the last post I will post my comments on Heidi Montag. I took this straight from TMZ so I’m sure there are copyright issues but for a blog that gets less than 50 visitors a day, I’m pretty sure it flies under the radar. I wrote yesterday that girls are shallow, irrational and notoriously bad drivers. I will also fall directly into this category except for the bad driver part. I get the feeling that girls are disgusted by what Heidi has done to herself with all the plastic surgery’s but I’m pro new Heidi. She went from this

To this

For someone who I will never meet in my life and could care less about, I’m all for whatever she wants to do to herself to make herself think she looks good. Doctors today can do amazing things to a person’s body and if she wants to risk death to look like that, it’s OK by me. This easily has me falling in shallow categories because I care more about her outside than inside and I’m irrational because in my heart I know it’s not right but my eyes tell me a different story. Life’s a funny place with contradictions all over. Just to quote Ayn Rand, “Contradictions do not exist. Whenever you think that you are facing a contradiction, check your premises. You will find that one of them is wrong.” It’s one of those things that the right girl wouldn’t do that to her body but if Heidi Montag came along, she’d be the right girl.

By |2016-10-28T15:20:57-04:00March 9th, 2010|Boobs|0 Comments

Hottest and Flattest

I’m banging out a two post night here so let’s give me some credit for putting forth the effort. I came up with this idea because I watched Dodgeball and Christine Taylor was in it and she didn’t have a huge rack but I still thought she was incredibly hot. I suppose you could read that last sentence and think that if you don’t have a nice pair than I can’t possibly think you are hot but that is not the case. If I were to watch a porno, I would prefer a big chest than a regular girl because most likely it’s not as attainable. However, there’s much more to females than just the boobs, they do have personalities and there’s something to say for girls who don’t get sucked into the silicone age. This post is a couple of ridiculously good looking girls who have made it without any enhancements or the gift from god.

Christine Taylor- Married to Ben Stiller and was on Hey Dude as Melody. I used to love her as a kid on Hey Dude. She always made Brad look like such a dyke by over shadowing her with beauty. Ben Stiller obviously with some pretty good taste in selecting her. Probably not the best picture but she has the whole pureness look to her.

Kate Hudson – Yes she show’s her boobs in almost famous and they are tiny. She has that one scene in Me, you, and Dupree where she’s in that yellow bikini looking hot. I actually don’t really love her that much but I think she looks really good in this picture and that golden blonde hair is very nice.

Anna Kournikova- Not the best tennis player but seriously so hot. I’m not sure she can necessarily be called flat but she’s all natural and a real beauty. This picture says it all.

Alessandra Ambrosia – I actually just saw her on TMZ today. Yes I do go to TMZ because it has celebrity gossip that makes for good conversation with girls. Anyway, she’s smoking and fits the criteria. I pretty sure that’s a push up bra which makes them look so nice but she is pretty much a ten. Victoria Secret model by the way

Shakira- Oh baby when you dance like that… I think she’s 5 feet or so and she moves that body like a cyclone. I don’t really think she’s that hot in pictures but when you see her on video it’s as black rob would say “like whoa.”

Natalie Gulbis – Not part of the criteria but this is just such a good picture of a golfer. Most female golfers are lesbians but with more on the tour looking like this, I might tune in.

By |2016-10-28T15:20:46-04:00March 9th, 2010|Boobs|4 Comments

Read my blog

Jkash told me my last entry was lame, Jill said she was disappointed with the short entries, and Wagon doesn’t like it unless I write about money or sports. I would just like to say that it’s not easy to come up with quality posts daily and I’m not really a writer. I used to get B’s in English and my papers were usually weak sauce. However, all the negative thoughts aside, the one thing I have going for me is that if I can write something that entertains me, then most likely it will entertain you. I keep this blog for no other reason than to put my thoughts on paper and to have a history of my life. I don’t plan to make money off it, thus no advertisements. In some sense I would like to have more readers only to fulfill a sense of accomplishment that I could create something that people actually want to read. I actually hesitate sometimes to write things down because people can take everything I write in here literally and personally and think I’m making attacks which is never the case. Some thoughts by me on life.

– Guys shouldn’t do Yoga classes
– Don’t run outside in shorts if the weather is 45 degrees or lower
– It’s not ok to not visit the dentist
– Soda is bad for you and can lead to pancreatic cancer. Do not want.
– Too much Iced Tea leads to kidney stones
– People who only walk on treadmills bother me
– You should own a nice pair of jeans (no wrangler or levis)
– Wearing t-shirts more than once (for the whole day) without washing them after is not OK
– Unless you’re over 40, the mustache is a difficult look to pull off
– Lights for your car should auto turn on and off anytime the car starts whether dark or night
– Listening to Elton John doesn’t make you gay
– Listening to Adam Lambert does
– The #2 pencil will go down in the history books
– The big bang theory was not 5,000 years ago
– You should have at least 4 pair of shoes. 2 casual to swap looks, one athletic, and one dress. Sandals are ok
– I bite my fingernails but never below the nail
– You should own at least one suit
– Compliments are good ice breakers
– The richest counties are predominantly in the northeast so I think this should be good data for where the brains of the country are located
– Although I find hand cream to be feminine, I have used it on occasion
– The CD is a dying breed
– The spoon and fork should be replaced by the spork, it would really save on the amount of silverware produced
– Girls at bars need to get off their high horse. Basically girls are shallow, irrational, and notoriously bad drivers. I don’t really believe this but the more I pay attention, the more I see it.
– What’s amazing is that we live in the best country and it’s run by a govt who steals from it’s people and a corporate world run by thieves.
– The shocker is my new photo trademark. If you want to take a picture with me I’ll ruin it with the shocker, just a warning.

The older I get the less dependent on other people I’ve become. I can see myself as one of those regulars at a diner who come in at the same time everyday, order the same thing, read the same paper, and work that routine year after year. The highlight of my day is waking up and then living the first hour. I get in my car, listen to music I like, eat my bbq sunflower seeds, get a breakfast I enjoy, and then reading the Wall Street Journal to keep me up to date on what’s happening in the business world. That makes me happy. That and listening to music when I’m drunk. I don’t need a lot of money or fancy cars or a mansion. I wrote it before, give me a place to live, a warm environment with a golf course and nothing to do and that’s what I want. I’d wake up, do my routine, go for a run, and then spend my time golfing or reading. I would prefer that lifestyle to what I’m doing now which is working the grind 5 days a week and then getting wasted the rest of the time. The working leads to the drinking which leads to the problems. I’m a pretty simple person with simple needs. I don’t aspire to change the world or make a difference. Maybe I’ll find someone that makes me happy and have some little TC’s but not until I can take care of myself, can I take care of anyone else.

No mistakes this time Jill.

By |2010-03-09T00:23:05-05:00March 9th, 2010|My Brain, My Life|3 Comments

Weekend Recap

I don’t have much material but I figured I’ll update anyhow so I don’t disappoint any Monday workers who are looking to kill some time. Believe me, I know Monday is easily the worst work day of the week. When you start on Monday it is the most possible time left of the work week and that feeling alone is tough to overcome. On Friday night I went to the Borgata by myself. This was intentional as to stay away from alcohol and hopefully have a tame night. So I played poker to start for about 4 hours. I ended up losing 250 and it was easily the worst I’ve played in a long time. Basically people were catching cards on the turn and river against me and my moves were getting owned. I stacked one guy with AA on a q9292 board and he had 88 literally gifting me his last 70 dollars. Then I lost some on a stupid move against a fish and then I stacked another guy with 99 when I turned a 9 and he had qq with an A on board so I’m not really sure what he was doing. Besides those two big hands I couldn’t get anything going and left frustrated. So I decided to play some Pai Gow and turned 300 into 700 after a few hours and decided to leave at 1:45 in the morning up a hundred plus dollars. It only took me exactly 1 hour and 1 minute to get back from AC to Manayunk.

On Saturday I woke up and did a 7 mile run which was my first run outside since fall. I felt ok but I’m no where near where I need to be to break an hour for the broad street run. I still have plenty of time to train and hopefully the weather will allow me to run outside more often. My knees were bothering me a bit after I ran and today I was still feeling it. Saturday was my standard get too drunk and not have a fun time. I started drinking at around 530 and by 11 I was wasted. The bartender gives me free drinks so that doesn’t really help my cause. I really have to start drinking later. If I started all my weekends at 9pm I would have better chance for fun. As is I’m just completely wasting my time and fun.

Things have been pretty normal lately. People are going to AC for the A10 tourney which I don’t have a huge amount of interest in but it’s a much needed change of pace from the norm. I’m going to try to get my usual exercise in and keep on keeping on. I have a couple of ideas for this blog upcoming so stay tuned in. As Chad pointed out I need a line at the end of each post that is like a signature. I haven’t come up with one but I’m thinking about it.

By |2010-03-09T09:28:17-05:00March 8th, 2010|My Brain|1 Comment

No New News

Nothing doing really. Kristin from Kristin and the noise was decent last night but I learned my lesson from the previous weekend and took it easy(er). There’s really no point to the post other than to point out that I have nothing to write about. I’m not necessarily running out of things to write about but I have done close to 150 entries and I sometimes find myself writing about the same thing. For instance, I think I’ve probably wrote that last sentence in 10 previous posts. Boredom aside though I’m glad this week is over.

By |2010-03-09T09:28:27-05:00March 5th, 2010|My Brain|0 Comments

Birthday’s Galore

It’s the shee’s birthday tonight and Jkash’s birthday on Saturday. Jkash asked me if there are any hot females that read my blog and if so to tell them that he’s look for birthday sex (ayayayaya). Sadly, I’m not sure how many hot females read this and probably moreso, how many would respond to this request. Nevertheless I did my part in getting the word out there. Tonight is Thursday Mad River with some band. I think the crowd should be decent and with it being the Shee’s birthday, it should lead to a good night. Also if you take Jkash up on the offer don’t forget to tell a friend about the marketing genius behind it.

By |2010-03-09T09:28:37-05:00March 4th, 2010|My Life|1 Comment

Morning

I put this link on facebook for the first time in a while. I don’t really like self promotion but exposure every once in a while is necessary. I woke up early today and went to the gym before going to work. With these scrapes on my face I’m sure people at the gym are hoping I’m not unsanitary. I’ve gotten a few weird looks and some woman at this food place asked me what happened. I really feel for people who have permanent marks and have to deal with this on a daily basis. I just wanted to intro the post I wrote last night with this post. Here’s a good song being played on altnation now as well.

By |2010-03-03T16:39:20-05:00March 3rd, 2010|My Brain|0 Comments

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