McKayla Maroney Working Twitter

Who takes these pics of her? A few months ago there was a big disagreement between Pres and Big Cat from Barstool about whether she knew what she was doing when she was posting all her provocative pictures. Pres thought she absolutely was posting pictures to raise the penis and Big Cat said she was just an immature girl. After this last tweet, Big Cat finally gave in.

The one thing to point out about McKalya is that she won silver in vault at the Olympics. This isn’t some bimbo like Kim Kardashian doing this for the attention. This can however be debated. For me it’s half and half. She’s only 18 and is pretty green to the world so I don’t think she knows exactly what she’s doing. On the other hand, she must love the attention because “she keeps throwing haymakers.” Judge for yourself.


A bit low cut



That is a sultry look.


Going with the immature side here.


This is just unfair.


Makes me think she knows what she’s doing.


Haymaker city here.


Why show this much?



Case closed. She knows.

By |2016-10-28T15:25:26-04:00August 1st, 2014|Boobs|0 Comments

Dinosaurs Are Always a Good Laugh


Dinosaur references are not used enough to make jokes. I rarely hear the mighty Pterodactyl mentioned. Or what about the Stegosaurus? Land Before Time jokes referencing Little Foot need to be brought back into common vernacular. Denver the last dinosaur was my favorite TV show.  Who doesn’t laugh at this scene?

And this one:

There’s nothing wrong with replying to pornstar’s and telling them you want to be T-Rex. Normal behavior.

By |2014-04-10T12:58:29-04:00April 10th, 2014|Boobs|3 Comments

Katy Perry Gifs

If I had to pick a celebrity to bang, it would be Katy Perry. I’d usually favor a blonde with a huge rack but I think the total Katy Perry package is what my package would prefer. She’s beautiful, she has an infamous rack, her music is inspiring to millions, and she genuinely seems like a good person. I remember hearing a crazy story when Howard Stern was interviewing Russell Brand and he was jokingly say that him and Katy would have wheelchair sex. As it was later found out (no proof obviously), he wasn’t joking around but only pretending to be joking around in the interview. There’s no way she’d be as famous without her boobs aiding her career. Either way, enjoy these Gifs because these are the best Katy Perry Gifs on the internet.

Coming Into Place

Coming Into Place

Bouncing Breasts

Bouncing Breasts

Always Brightens a Mood

Always Brightens a Mood

Is this symbolic?

Is this symbolic?

Quality is fine here.

Quality is fine here.

By |2016-10-28T15:26:00-04:00March 19th, 2014|Boobs|2 Comments

Barstool Notoriety With Angie Varona

I sent this tweet to Maurice of Barstool yesterday:


angie[dropcap background=”yes” color=”#333333″]I [/dropcap]knew that this girl was hot from past years because there was tons controversy that surrounded her pictures because she was only 16. That was back in 2009, so I assumed she was legal now and came across a thread at pocketfives that reminded me of her. I know Barstool has a Wake Up With post that they put every morning at 9am and this girl would be a great candidate. Maurice of Philly is always credited with posting the Wake Up With so I simply tweeted the link to Angie Varona’s instagram as indicated above. What happened was quite surprising.

Since Barstool has gotten so convoluted with repeat posts and nonsense, I’ve only been reading the Philly and my check in time of 10am found this page being displayed. Initially, I was ecstatic that I was being displayed so prolifically on a BarStool post. My dreams of pageviews and unique visitors were sky high. Then I check the comments and read this:

[pullquote align=”left”]This Tom Stortz guy strikes me as someone who isn’t allowed within a certain distance from schools.. or Chuck E. Cheeses[/pullquote]

and this

[pullquote align=”right”]You know how young she is, right Mo? [/pullquote]





So instantly I’m overcome with 1) feeling like a douchebag for creeping on this girl 2) Hoping she’s not actually 16 and I’m about to be signing up with Megan’s Law. I started searching to verify this hottie’s age and began hoping the Barstool commenters wouldn’t take my self esteem for a ride down South. I’m not Miley Cyrus now and have never been exposed to any type of publicity so I’m not sure how I could handle it. Fortunately my worries meant nothing.

To sum up this experience, there was no experience. 1 follower was produced from Barstool and that was someone I already knew and there was exactly 0 referrals to my site. If this doesn’t generate any followers how in fucking hell am I going to land a better opportunity? For what it’s worth, the girl maintained a 9.05 rating which should at least give my female model standards some credit. I will say that it is quite encouraging to tweet the main person of a blog like that and have him give credit where credit is due. I won’t be creepy about it but I’ll always keep that in my back pocket.

By |2016-10-28T15:23:01-04:00November 13th, 2013|Boobs|1 Comment

Big Boobed British Bombshells

I’ve stumbled across a type of female who I believe are the hottest on the planet, the big boobed British bombshell. I’ve never been a fan of the rail thin, Victorian Secret, supermodel types even though critics deem them the best looking in the world. After some Barstool pics and some of my own “research”, I’m going to deliver a post that will contain pictures of British models who are the finest females on the planet.

Alice Goodwin – 32E-24-34 – 27 year old glamour model from Stoke-on-Trent, England.

Kelley Hazell – 32F-24-36 – 26 year old English glamour model, former Page Three girl and actress.

Jennifer Ellison – 32DD-25-33 – 30 year old English actress, glamour model, television personality, dancer and singer.

Gemma Atkinson – 36E-24-36 – 28 year old is an English actress, television personality and glamour and lingerie model.

Lucy Pinder – 32G-26-34 – 29 year old English model, with natural breasts, known for her appearances in men’s magazines such as Nuts.

Thank me later.

By |2016-10-28T15:23:18-04:00September 16th, 2013|Boobs|0 Comments

Start and Finish on Madison Ivy

I’m going to immediately begin by saying that if you are easily offended by sex, stop at this sentence. I usually try to keep my blog safe for work, and this will be aside from the text, but this post is for adults. This post will give a synopsis of the career of Madison Ivy and what it’s like to watch her growth and transition from new to porn to consummate professional. Madison Ivy gets top ratings for her videos in 2013 but this hasn’t always been the case. She’s been around since 2008 when a comparison of then and now will surprise you. I will give my reaction to a 5 year period of how someone went from rags to riches.

This was Madison Ivy in 2009 PRE BOOB JOB. Her videos were completely sick and I don’t mean sick like dirty, nasty sick, but sick as in cool, awesome sick. She was this tiny 4-11 girl getting railed and enjoying her craft. Blonde hair and petite was her trademark. She seemed like she’d do anything and liked it.
Madison Ivy Pre Boob Job

Here is Madison Ivy in 2013.

HUGE boobs for a small girl and this tweet scores. In those past 5 years she probably did 83 videos. This doesn’t even count the amount of scenes, just videos. Most likely she’s been railed a few hundred times for scenes and something has happened in her acting ability. She isn’t just showing up and getting banged like she did in 2008, she’s putting on a performance. This is both good and bad. Bad because the reality is altered but great because her acting has gotten phenomenal. After 5 years of shooting scenes she gained the experience to put on a show that most porn stars have no clue how to do. She separated herself from so many others in this trade and her high marks and views back this up. I personally find her to be top notch because her small stature and disproportionate figure. She keeps herself in shape which in my opinion is a must for a prospering starlet. All in all, other pornstars should copy her for how to act in front of the camera. The transformation over this past 5 years should be a test study on the psychology of a pornstar. Here are a few more pictures to maintain interest. I’d also like a comment if you’ve never heard of her before – don’t lie!

Not bad w/o makeup.
Makeup transformation of Madison Ivy

Her Bio
Tiny (4’11”), but buxom and shapely blonde bombshell Madison Ivy was born Clorisa Briggs on June 14, 1989 in Bayern, Germany. The blue-eyed beauty was raised in Texas. Ivy eventually moved to Sacramento, California, where she laid tile, worked for the fast food restaurant chain In-N-Out Burger, and was a mechanic at a bowling alley. Madison started out in the adult entertainment industry dancing at a strip club. During this time she met adult film actress Aurora Snow, who gave Ivy the necessary contacts to begin a career in porn. Madison first began performing in explicit hardcore movies in her late teens in 2008; she has appeared in X-rated features for such notable companies as Hustler, Pure Play Media, Brazzers, Elegant Angel, and Bang Productions. Moreover, Ivy also works as a personal trainer and yoga instructor. She was nominated for an AVN Award for Best Tease Performance in 2012.

By |2014-02-11T22:11:41-05:00April 24th, 2013|Boobs|2 Comments

Katy Perry’s Cleavage Green Dress at the Grammy’s

Katy Perry Smoking Green Dress

How great is this dress? Especially when the Grammy’s were asking to hide some skin and keep the affair as PG as possible, Katy busts out with a skin tight, cleavage baring, show stopping dress. I hardly watched any of the Grammy’s but when the camera panned the crowd she stood out like a firework. I was wide awake any time she appeared on screen almost like she was a part of me. Enough displaying my teen girl knowledge of Katy’s catalog. I think she blows away all female starlet competition with her bazookas. I still can’t figure out her man situation. Russell Brand is an English womanizer who liked to have wheelchair sex with her and John Mayer is such a sweet sounding Nancy that it just isn’t going to work out. She needs a normal guy who can run 6 minute miles and feed off of her success. After viewing this picture, I’m pretty sure it’s clear where to vote on the poll to the right.

By |2016-10-28T15:24:08-04:00February 11th, 2013|Boobs|1 Comment

Busty Broads

There is a standard question of whether you are an ass man or a boobs guy. Based on my genetic makeup, I’ve never found a big fat ass that appealing. I think it’s nice, but a playful set of boobs catches my attention. I’m the – and cleavage is like a + if we were magnets. I sometimes find the girls with their clothes on more attractive than with them off. From a practical standpoint, I’d think females would want a fat ass rather than to lug boobs around. To round out this topic, I wanted post picture of 3 glorified hotties who fall in the upper echelon of big boobs.

Lucy Pinder

Gemma Atkinson

Erica Campbell

By |2013-03-15T03:03:46-04:00December 19th, 2012|Boobs|2 Comments

Top 5 Females I Want to Have Sex With

Each one of these females have some unique characteristic that puts them where they are in my own personal mind. So this isn’t exactly my but just 5 girls who top my list in no particular order, there just happens to be 5 of them because it’s not too few and not too much work. Another thing to note is that it’s not necessarily because they are hotter than other females, they just happen to be my 5. On to the list.

Hayden Panettiere

I’m probably the least sentimental towards Hayden because I haven’t really seen much she’s done. I’m just aware of her existence and in *Lloyd Christmas voice* I like you a lot. Just look at that GIF. That body is tight as can be and her face is absolutely beautiful. The dating Vladimir Klitschko is certainly off putting because he probably stretched it all out but still, she should be on every guy’s list. The best part of her Wikipedia and shows her intelligence “Panettiere has a tattoo of the Italian words Vivere senza rimipianti running down her left side. The word rimpianti is misspelled in what otherwise would mean “Living Without Regrets”. We’ll just assume she meant to do that and is really advanced.

Bree Olson

You may, but probably won’t, know her as Charlie Sheen’s goddess. Now I’m not sure if the mass public really understands who Bree Olson is. She’s porn star obviously but what isn’t known is that she’s the dirtiest, filthiest, nastiest porn star out there. I’m not saying compared to the really extreme, next level shit but she has such a mouth on her. That was an accidental pun I stumbled into but she is just the master of dirty talk. If you watch it and don’t want to fuck her after her video, something is wrong with you.

Tiffani Amber Theissen

Tiffani Amber is a straight up nostalgia bang. I remember being 13 or something and would just crush on Kelly and this was probably before I even knew what jerking off was. This was pure love. The fact that she grew up and become a smokeshow is just all the better. She never really blossomed into mainstream Hollywood which I think is all the cooler. It means she never sold out. I just found out she dropped the Amber.

Jennifer Love Hewitt

She stole my heart as Amanda Beckett in Can’t Hardly Wait. When she’s in the train station with Ethan Embry I’m just thinking, goddammit Ethan you lucky son of a bitch, fate only takes you so far, bang the shit out of her. The thing was that she just continued to get hotter. She peaked in heartbreakers and probably still looks great today according to the recent picture above proving females can still look good past 30. I will always consider myself a JLH fan.

Katy Perry

She really just tops my celebrity fuck list. I think it’s the power, the prestige, the talent and the boobs. I’d be lying completely if I didn’t think she has the best rack on this planet. She’s just a really beautiful human being who knows how to use what was giving to her. I just can’t rightfully top her. No kidding. Her and Russell Brand used to have wheel chair sex which shows her acceptance to new ideas. Plus she even had the guts to rock her cleavage on Sesame Street, how great is that!

Honorable mention: Stacy Kiebler, Selma Hayek, Sofia Vergera, Kate Upton

By |2016-10-28T15:24:25-04:00October 17th, 2012|Boobs|0 Comments

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