“Nobody’s gotten a hand job in cargo shorts since (viet)nam” – Seth (Jonah Hill) in Superbad

To this day I still wear cargo shorts. Hell, I’m actually wearing a pair right now as I type this. I’d guess 10-15 years ago when I started doing my own shopping, I thought you were a geek if you didn’t wear cargo shorts. It took me until the 6th grade to even wear a pair of jeans and I promise you I wasn’t comfortable. With my ultimate fashion wisdom, it has come to my attention that cargo shorts are out. Most people are probably well aware of this trend but I was late to the party. Does this mean that if you wear cargo shorts you are immediately black listed and put in the uncool club? Probably not because I don’t think what you wear should determine how cool you are. However, I will make the observation that I don’t think I’ve ever actually used the cargo pockets that make cargo shorts cargo shorts. Maybe the idea of having extra pockets to carry around all the extra accessory items people have is thrilling but aside from maybe a golf ball or two, it’s never come up for me. I suppose I also find regular Dockers to look a little more professional. Cargo’s look like you are ready to go on a camping trip. Considering I still own a few cargo’s I don’t think I’ll be tossing them out, rather phasing them into pants that I don’t care if I ruin them. Basically, I have clothes that I don’t care if I get dirty and clothes I try to keep nice.