I'm always this happy in the chair.

I’m always this happy in the chair.

I visit the dentist every 6 months. I get a new hygienist to clean my teeth every time because I am not particular who does the job so I get scheduled with whoever is open. Since I have a revolving door of people looking at my teeth, I get a new opinion on what I should be doing each visit. This time was no different.

I made a 7am appointment so it doesn’t interfere with my work. I use a dentist that I’ve used since I was a kid and travel to the burbs to go. I got there a few minutes early and sat in the parking lot until it opened. While I was in the parking lot a person taps on my window and asks if this was the only lot for the dentist. Wat? I said it was and she told me she was a temp and wanted to make sure she was in the right place.

I entered at 6:58 and I waited in the waiting room for 15 minutes. I was a bit confused because I was the first person, got there on time, and still had to wait. When I was put into the chair, I was met with the parking lot woman. Wonderful.

solarshieldThe woman was 40 or so and we start off by her giving me protective eye wear. I looked at the eye wear, looked at her, started laughing, and put on my sunglasses to have my teeth cleaned. Then she said, “I’ve got a runny nose, tis the season.” Then she blew her nose and washed her hands. When you’re not sick, the last people you want to be around are sick people.  Comforting. She gets to work and asks me how often I floss which I said 4-5 times.  She said, “you know it’s supposed to be 7 right?” Then she gave me a mirror and showed me how to floss properly. This was all going on while she rested her boobs on my head as she cleaned my teeth. I think she was purposely doing it because she would say, “lean more to the side,” then plant them in my face.

This is how Curb Your Enthusiasm’s are created. I would never be able to go to the dentist have them clean my teeth and leave without a story. For what it’s worth, the actual dentist is really normal.