We Don't Walk Slow

Improving a Website

This blog sucked. When Sam posted that screenshot of my past blog, I went back 3 years ago and started reading dated entries and became mentally distraught. All I wrote about was going out in Manayunk, gambling, and basketball. The grammar and spelling were atrocious. It read like the writing of a problem drinker/gambler with no education. That’s probably being a tad severe but I believe this website has grown leaps and bounds. The format, the writing, the ideas, and everything else that goes along with this website has shown progress. To give you an idea of the actual growth, throughout the month of June in 2013, I had 6,532 unique visitors. Back in 2010, I had 227. That achievement is something that I think can be attributed towards hard work and determination.

There was something engaging about my older entries though, they were me being me. I played poker for hours on end, gambled on sports, got black out drunk, essentially me in my glory. I could see how people would actually prefer to read about that then what I’ve been posting as of late. It’s like a summation of what you don’t want to do in life. So to the people who knew me, they could live vicariously through my dopey self. To everyone else though, there was no real content within the blog. That’s why as you read my recent posts, you’ll see that they are more about ideas or thoughts that anyone could relate to instead of a play by play of my daily activities. I find it funny that I never grasped that concept back in 2010. Fortunately, I get older, get wiser, and continue to improve my website.

I still have no goal for this site which is a vague, uncertain outlook. I’ve already wrote how comments could help but it also comes down to my interaction with other people. For example, commenting on other blogs, re-tweeting, being involved in other people’s sites to expand my network. I tend to keep things close to the vest though and don’t actively seek out other people. This would be something that I’ll add to my list of self weaknesses. I’ve always rather done things by myself than with other people. The reason is because I don’t like complicating my life or as a therapist (I’ve never seen one) would put it “leaving my comfort zone.” My issue is that I try to be as real, and as nice as possible, and that combo doesn’t jive with most people. Mainly because if I have to be real, I can’t be nice (this obviously depends on the person). But that doesn’t mean that I don’t want to work and expand. I’m well aware that connecting with people is a key to life. In the same fashion of how my blog improved since 2010 in content, you’ll see the same expansion in the connections I intend to make. If anyone reads this blog frequently and wants to help out on this matter, I’m here to work with you.

By Tom Stortz|2013-07-08T18:49:40-04:00July 8th, 2013|My Life|1 Comment

Feeling Inflated

Is anyone else noticing money disappearing from their wallet at an extraordinary rate? I’ve gone to the ATM 6 times in 6 days. I’ll usually hit the ATM up for 50 bucks and my lifestyle turns that to 0 within a few hours notice. 30 bucks for lunch, 30 for a case, 10 for a taxi, 30 for dinner, 50 for golf, you get the idea. I’m aware that this is a holiday weekend but this feels ridiculous. I can’t remember where I read it but the premise was that money doesn’t make you happy. I know one thing for certain, not having it doesn’t help.

I think the economy and inflation may have to do with this feeling. Inflation is more likely an effect that can be felt rather than seen. Obviously prices in Philadelphia are going to be higher than the suburbs but it’s more than that. It’s the idea that doing anything requires money. It’s an extremely challenging task to enjoy what this world has to offer without spending any cash. You can walk and run anywhere you want but doing activities will run you dry. This has always been a secondary concern of mine because I’ve never been in a situation where my back is against the wall financially. With my life plan of purchasing a house, all of this will change and I’m proving to myself that saving money, or even not spending as much money, isn’t happening.

The obvious solution to this quandary is to make more money. If I give up my free time and either work harder at my current job or find another job, then I can relieve some of this pressure. Another one of life’s paradoxes, give up your freedom to live by working for a “better” life style. The amazing this about this is that I’m complaining IN MY POSITION! There are millions of people on this Earth who have it way worse than me. What gives me the right to whine like a baby? I’m born into the best country, sitting in my air conditioned room, blogging on my dual monitors. When I put that in perspective, I just take a deep breath and let it happen.

By Tom Stortz|2013-07-06T11:41:48-04:00July 6th, 2013|My Life|3 Comments

Lovin the Elevator

Terrible elevator experience today. I walk into the building noticing that someone is 20 ft behind me. I felt like this was too far to hold the door open so I decided to rush inside and pick up the pace on the way to the elevator to avoid any interaction. Everything was going fine as I hit the button and an elevator was promptly opened. Inside I decide to rapidly start pushing the close door button. The door closes and I thought I was completely home free until I realized that I didn’t press my floor. The hipster female who I didn’t hold the door for had hit the up button while I was waiting inside and now the door was opening up. I’m standing there with an expression on my face like “fucking great.” I’m sure she didn’t know I was hitting the close door button but she obviously knew I didn’t hold the door for her. We rode in silence, avoiding eye contact, and I eagerly awaited the end of the two story ride. If I just would have held the door, this would have never happened.

Is there anything to gain from this anecdote? No. There isn’t. You hold doors if it is natural timing, not because it’s required. Also, don’t forget to hit your floor number.

This wasn’t a good post but I have to post something. I thought Sam and I were making some decent headway and this clunker is a step back. I have some time over the next few days though that hopefully I can come up with some good content.

By Tom Stortz|2013-07-05T21:57:32-04:00July 5th, 2013|My Life|0 Comments

No Phones on the Dinner Table

Leaving your phone out on the table during a meal has to be one of the rudest, inconsiderate, disgraceful acts of social behavior. By keeping your phone on the table you are saying that your phone is more important than the people around you. There are no if, ands, or buts, I don’t give a fuck how important your game or person on the other end of that phone is, it’s flat out unmannerly. The phone stack game should become a necessity amongst crowds.

The phone stack game is a novel idea (it’s actually not because it’s been around for quite a while but it’s news to me). All parties place their phones on the table, and the first person to grab their phone to check for a text or call loses and has to pick up the check. This is obviously something that is extreme and not actually practical but there should be some guidelines to phone use during dinner.

Phone Stack Game

A few phone rules to live by
1) No phone on the table
2) A phone can be checked if it is being used as part of the discussion ie) looking up something you are talking about
3) A check of the phone is ok if it doesn’t last more than 5 seconds and is during a break of the action
4) Texting or talking at the table is not allowed

This is another important thought:
Psychologists who conducted the experiments at Essex University believe mobile phones automatically trigger thoughts about wider social networks, reducing the level of empathy and understanding in face-to-face conversations.

The point of this post is that someone needs to inform people of this. Younger people especially will grow up believing that phones on the table is fine. When I see this behavior, I immediately know that the person has their priorities jumbled. Just being aware that it’s impolite should be a start to fixing this. Emails, texts, and games shouldn’t supersede another human being as difficult as it is. I personally don’t care if I’m relaxing at a bar drinking a beer how often someone checks their phones but when you are in a dinner atmosphere, that’s where the line gets drawn. If you know someone like this, send them a text with a link to this post.

By Tom Stortz|2013-06-27T21:00:33-04:00June 27th, 2013|My Life|0 Comments

Creaky Old Man

I’ve always heard older people complaining about their body and assumed that they were being pussies. As long as all your body parts were working and you weren’t doing anything seriously outrageous to harm them, you should be fine. I’m reconsidering that position as I age. I can’t explain why it seems like everything that I do results in some part of my body being affected. It doesn’t matter if it’s throwing a baseball, hitting a golf ball, or reading a book, something is going to fall out of place. I’m even more concerned because I have a feeling this is only the beginning.

Yesterday I didn’t do anything to bring on pain and for some reason my oblique was bothering me. I went for a run after golf and felt for lack of a better word, tired. This morning I got 8 full hours of sleep and still felt like I could stay in bed for a few more hours. My elbow is in pain any single time it comes in contact with anything. It can brush up against something and it feels like my funny bone just hit the emergency switch. This is from breaking far too many falls with my elbows. My knees are so beat up they look like they’ve been through a war. With only a few more months to say I’m in my twenty’s, I feel like I’m in my forties.

Even with all this complaining, I’m still working towards a superior fitness level for myself. I’ve been using the Art Museum steps as a training source rather than a track and I have a feeling I’m going to see tremendous results. I’m down to 172 which is what I believe is my ideal running weight. Ideal is probably closer to 165 but I’d be a twig. I went to the gym today for the first time and it was pathetic how much I could lift after a few month hiatus. I don’t think anyone will be calling on me for any strength reasons though so I should be alright. I’ve done a great job throughout my life at avoiding major (and minor) injury but it seems like I’m constantly finding nagging issues. I usually wouldn’t even use a post to write about them but I honestly have nothing else to write about. This was pretty much filler until I can find some time to work in some of my better ideas for posts.

By Tom Stortz|2013-06-24T22:45:42-04:00June 24th, 2013|My Life|1 Comment

Boardgame Challenge

After getting a few people saying they’d play Clue with me and our attempt at setting up a Risk game, I decided to propose a formal challenge. I would like to have 12 people in this but 6 would also work, nothing in between. The idea would be to put aside an afternoon / night and compete in 3 different, 6 person, board games. Points would be awarded for places and like the strong man competition, the winner would be the one with the most points. If we had 12 people, the winner from each group would go 1v1 in a 5 game Rock-Paper-Scissor to crown the ultimate champion. I was thinking a 20 dollar entry fee would be reasonable and we’d split the cash 75 / 25 amongst the winners from the group. The games would be as follows:

Risk x 1

Clue x 3

Trivial Pursuit x 1

2,4,6,8,10,12 for Risk and Trivial Pursuit. 5 for the winner of clue, 2 if you don’t get a chance to guess and 0 for the wrong guess. I’d have to think about it and see if anything was more fair. If you’d be interested in joining this affair, I’d provide the beer and setting, you provide the entertainment. Leave a comment and we’ll get an email chain started.

By Tom Stortz|2013-06-21T14:51:20-04:00June 21st, 2013|My Life|7 Comments

Oh, The Places You’ll Go

There were quite a few blog worthy topics for me this weekend. The US open was near Philly, I played a round of golf on Saturday, a Fresh Foods experience, and even a rousing game of horse all come to mind. I’ll use bullets instead of paragraph form because I don’t have anything to intertwine all of these random happenings.

I took it easy on Friday night because Bud and I planned an 11:28 golf round at Turtle Creek. I woke early on Saturday, went for a run across the Ben Franklin bridge, posted an entry on this site, and then met Bud at the course. We played with an elderly couple, Jack and Ruth, who were actually very good for their age. I managed to shoot 89 while putting erratically all day. Probably my best driving round of the year though. Bud had some unbelievable tee-shots as well.

We then headed to the courts to play some Bball with Sam and Gourlay. Gourlay, the captain, chose Sam over me which proves his ability as a manager. Only two notes on the games were my block that was rejected right back in Sam’s grill and Jeff raping Gourlay on a drive to the basket. He liked it.

Sunday began with a trip to Fresh Foods where we picked up a Tiramisu for our dad on Father’s day. I inquisitively asked why there was hardly a counter space to put items on at the check out line and parted by telling the customers that “Fresh Foods sucked”. It really didn’t but it seemed outrageously priced.

The game of horse amongst the Stortz boys was historic. To start things off I hit a 27 foot 3 point shot which Sam missed. After exclaiming that my last shot was too easy I banked a 35 ft shot from the welcome mat by the deck that Sam missed again. Once Sam was eliminated it was down to Jeff and I. Saying one more time that my last shot was too easy, I attempted a 70 ft sidewalk shot that was virtually perfect in every way and dropped through the basket to make me the winner. It was a thing of beauty and Jeff said that he couldn’t even look at me right now.

By Tom Stortz|2013-06-17T10:12:42-04:00June 17th, 2013|My Life|0 Comments

Growing Up A Man

Every second that passes in your life, you gain experience. Experience helps you make better decisions and improve. To use the Office Space mantra, you should be the smartest in your entire life at every passing moment. Now obviously drugs, alcohol, and other life events can certainly affect this mentality but I think the premise holds true. With more participation in life, you form a greater understanding of all aspects. This is what it takes to stop your body from withering away into a boy body when it should be a fully grown man body!

I reviewed some posts that I wrote up back in 2007 and 2008 and it’s funny how I look at what I was writing back then and how my perspective on life has both changed a ton and not at all depending on the idea. Here is an excerpt:

TC & CK4 & James – Circa 2006
Sportin that plain white T and you know CK4 still has that sweatshirt

8/20/2007

When I think about my life, it occurs to me how small and insignificant my life really is. In the grand scheme of things, considering the size of the universe and the illusion of time, my life is meaningless.

80 years life expectancy is just a short run in a universe that’s been around for billions and billions of years.

Meaning, people’s “major” problems are usually not as bad as they seem.

Long Term Goals

Be happy.

Be a better person – mentally and physically

Enjoy freedom

Don’t injure yourself.

Help others?

How to obtain long term goals

Develop good friendships/relationships

Make money so living is easier

Why do people do things?

Improve themselves / society

Challenge and competition

Proving to be the best

The motivation of money

What should I be doing?

?????? – Something I enjoy

What should I not be doing?

Wasting my life as it passes me by

So the goal of a person’s life is what?

This was almost 6 years ago and my ideals haven’t changed much. I think I’ve improved on the action of what it takes to make these thoughts happen in the past 6 years but I’m essentially the same person except 6 years have passed. It’s almost scary how little my mind’s big picture ideas have changed. Where I’ve found personal growth is in my manner of dealing with people. It’s probably the main part of my life which I’ve been working on in the past year especially. I look back at the person writing this 6 years ago and believe I was mostly helpless compared to what I am now. I write this because I still feel mostly helpless but am gaining tools every day to encounter this life to be successful. This is one of the best reasons to maintain a blog. Looking back on something you wrote many years ago only to realize how little and much has changed. I have much more to write on this topic but don’t want to bog this entry down. I’ll write more later.

All grown up with Mom.

By Tom Stortz|2013-06-10T19:46:08-04:00June 10th, 2013|My Life|2 Comments

This one’s for you CK4

I humor myself sometimes with when I choose to share some posts. Last Monday Ck4 and I played in a golf scramble for charity that overall was a fun time. At one of the holes there was a putting contest where you had to make a 12 foot putt to be put into the next round. The prize was an Orlando vacation. Everyone from our foursome made the putt on the first try which was unbelievable. In the final round there were about 15 participants putting a 40 footer that had some major break to it. Ck4 ousted the field putting it within 18 inches and taking home the vacation. I know he was eagerly awaiting my blog post about this story because Ck4 loves posts about Ck4. Since I know how much he enjoys these posts, I just toy with him and delayed that story for a week. It was well worth it though because I have more Ck4 content due to waiting.

On Saturday, Nikkii had set up a surprise birthday party for Chad about two weeks prior to his birthday to guarantee a surprise. My job was to keep him distracted for the day and have him show up to the party at the appropriate time. I decided golf would be a good way to spend some time so I booked a round at Talamore for the two of us. We played from a back tee box and the course proved mightier than the players (I did par the #1 handicap hole). We were able to see some wildlife in a deer with a bad leg, a baby deer, 2 swans, and a snake in the grass.

Bambi at Talamore

A few highlights include on the 17th hole there is a row of houses on the right of the fairway. I’m standing behind Chad and see that he’s aimed directly at the houses for some unknown reason. Thinking that his swing will make the ball travel in another direction I didn’t say anything and what do you know, he hits a BB right at the houses and it 100% hit something. Then on 18 he was about 150 yards out and for absolutely no reason other than entertainment, decides to hit a yellow range ball as a practice approach shot. He ends up sailing one way off to the right where the member area and pool is and I couldn’t stop laughing at how absurd it is that 2 jokers on a trial membership are causing so much havoc at the hoity toity Talamore club. Bulls in a china shop. We ended up leaving at 5pm and headed to a bar to grab a bite to eat and have a few drinks. We killed the couple of hours and headed off to the party location.

When we got there no one was upstairs and I legitimately think Chad had no idea a party was coming his way. Once the surprise hit we enjoyed a nice evening playing various games and enjoying everyone’s company. It was a swell time. I like that word swell. If you ever want to hear any jingles from back in the day, ask Mr. Helmstetter. The kegerator was a nice touch as well. I think Sam retired as the corn-hole champ (jokes welcomed). It really ended up being a great day and what life is all about. There you go Ck4, you’re the star of the blog.

By Tom Stortz|2013-06-09T18:56:11-04:00June 9th, 2013|My Life|1 Comment

Dentist Drill

I went to the dentist today for a cleaning and I’m beginning to think it’s a scam. I regularly go every 6 months for them to clean my teeth and tell me that I don’t floss enough. Today the woman cleaning my teeth was poking around with a sharp pointed object and telling me there’s blood. No shit. Then she stumbled across some air pocket that she needed the actual dentist to check out. He looked at it and said that it was only an air pocket and no big deal. I tell this story because he could have told me I needed thousands of dollars of dental work when that air pocket was ready to explode. I would be clueless on whether any of it was necessary. I feel like the business of a dentist can never be bad because you can create work for yourself. What are you supposed to say if he tells you that you need to come back to get a cavity filled? You come back. People with full dental benefits couldn’t care less but when you pay for your own visits, you begin to question what hell is actually happening.

I don’t think anyone likes going to the dentist but there are way worse repercussions from not going compared to the minimal amount of money it takes to go. For the past 20 times I’ve gone to the dentist, they tell me the exact same thing, “you don’t floss enough”. I probably floss 4 times a week, they would want 14. My teeth don’t bother me in any regard whatsoever. However, the threat of future problems is another ploy they have in their back pocket. Once they get you in the chair (which is what they should focus on to be successful), they have you by the short hairs. If they gave me a hot dental hygienist, I probably wouldn’t complain, but that hasn’t been the case one time in my entire life. The Jennifer Aniston dentist fantasy definitely exists.

By Tom Stortz|2013-06-04T23:46:17-04:00June 4th, 2013|My Life|2 Comments