I was driving home today and saw a beggar in the street. He had up a sign that said “I’ve been sober for 167 days and your donation will get you a drawing.” I have these gold coins, they are 1 dollar bills, that I got from a parking lot when I put a 20 in and it gave me 14 dollars of gold coins back, that I honestly have no idea what to do with. I feel strange using them as currency as I was 30 years old the first time I’ve ever seen one. I’m not sure if all cashiers know they exist. Back to the story, I decided to give him a gold coin. I wave him over and hand him my gold dollar and he puts up 4 cardboard boxes with drawings on them. He says I can choose my favorite color scheme. The pretty much blew my mind because I wasn’t expecting a homeless guy to give me buying options. I said I didn’t care and took the red one. He said I picked a crown leaving an arrow. What do you think?
The funniest thing about this story was that he was wearing a Pitt shirt which makes me wonder how well the grads (or dropouts) are doing. Obviously he could have found this sweatshirt on the side of the road but I still found it humorous he wore my Alma Mater. How could I not help him out? I recently read that 6.8% of humans on the planet have a college degree. This made me feel better about myself but apparently it didn’t help this bloke.
Some hipster douche would give you 300 bucks for that thing
I bet the circles were a pain the ass. Who has the time to do that? I imagine some homeless guy sitting on a curb with a red pen for an hour making circles next to each other… oh wait.
How much will you give me for it?
That’s clearly a metaphor for his (arrow) relationship with his father (crown). You owe it to him to go back and help talk him through his issues, especially since he probably lost money on the transaction (supplies, time that could’ve been spent finding more than a dollar elsewhere).
Arrow leaving a crown makes more sense. That’s probably what he said. I bet you’re right on that analysis.
You could have him selling paint scrapers at the intersection. He could easily move up to be the new number 3 at the company (sorry Jeff).
People coming out of the woodwork to comment on this lazy Friday. The funniest thing about this is that while I was writing this post I thought to myself, “this is easily one of the dumbest stories I’ve ever shared.” It happened to me a few minutes before I got home and I had nothing to post (pro’s use post instead of blog) about so I pooped out this story in 10 minutes. I had planned going off on the tangent about the gold coins because I know Gourlay is a nerdy coin collector. Naturally this post receives the most comments I’ve received in ages.
The problem with selling paint scrapers is that it would look like a homeless guy is attacking motorists with a blade on a handle. He’d have to be really sharp to make that sale.
I’ll give you all the coins I own for this painting