I told my mom to visit my site tonight at dinner so I figure I might as well give her a taste of what my blog content is like. I was listening to Howard Stern today and he was telling a tale of how he only uses his Ipad for spanking it and then described that he liked baby sitter porn. There are certain factors that can make a porn scene good or bad. Howard said that he doesn’t like a girl with a gut and I agree 100%. You are in the business of getting naked and showing off your attributes so I can’t imagine it would be beneficial to not be in top notch shape. Here are a few of my pet peeves in porn scenes.

  • The guy shouldn’t talk or grunt, ever. You basically don’t even want to know he exists except to know that he’s a critical part of the main storyline which is the girl getting banged. His role is simple, let the girl be the lead and just do a good job of pleasing her.
  • No close ups. The reason a girl can be good at porn is because she’s got a banging body and a pretty face. When the camera zooms in on the actual intercourse, it could just as well be anybody. I don’t want to watch a zoomed in version of a dick going into a vagina. This reminds me of health class and not a pleasant experience.
  • The ideal position for a porn scene would be a zoomed out, reverse cowgirl with a smoking hot girl with big tits getting railed. The guy is completely blocked out, the girl is the center of the action and she should be enjoying herself which brings me to the next point.
  • The girl should be going wild. I don’t want the guy to make a peep but the girl should be having orgasm after orgasm (even if she is pretending). There has to be a feeling that the girl is actually enjoying herself to make the scene enjoyable. If she’s just half-assing it, the scene won’t come out authentic. I recommend watching Charlie’s girl Bree Olson in a tutorial on how to perform on screen.

    Well mom there you go. Look at the monstrosity that your son has become. I think it’s hilarious though because I prefaced by telling her that I’m 27 now and just be aware that I’m not a little kid anymore. I guarantee if she even reads the first line she won’t ever read another post which I think I’m OK with. She won’t ever understand the success that I’ll become from rnningfool.com but hopefully she’ll accept me for the fact that I tell it how it is. Next stop will be directing my own porno with all my porno wisdom.