The Text Killer

I’m going to make a pretty honest statement here that I’m not really pleased with sharing. I pretty much see every single text, email, missed phone call that comes to me within one hour. The only time the phone isn’t on me is when I’m at the gym or on a long run. Every time else, I’m actively involved in the communication people are trying to have with me. Meaning, if you call me and I don’t pick up, chances are there’s a reason. I hate to admit this because there are actual times when I just am not physically able to pick up and you now are going to think I’m blowing you off (that phrase is hilarious). So how does this relate to texting?

I get texts sometimes that are dying for a response. Like what did they say? Or did you see I did this? I sometimes purposely don’t respond. Ck4 only gets 200 texts so he doesn’t like when people text him because anything in excess costs 10 cents. I have unlimited texts so this obviously isn’t my reason for not responding to texts. I want to make a comparison with text messaging and the game of hot potato. I think it’s assumed that you never want to be stuck with the last text. Getting stuck with the last text means you aren’t giving the person proper attention. If I text you something, it seems appropriate to expect a text back just to acknowledge you received a text from me. Here’s a scenario that doesn’t require a text back. Did the phillies win today? Yes. Now here’s one that should be acknowledged. What time is our game today? 7pm. An appropriate text back is OK showing that you understand and you are confirming you were given the info. Obviously common sense can be applied to what should be responded to and what needs no response but I actively seek situations to kill texts.

I purposely am a text killer because if I don’t, the texts will never end. Even with unlimited texts I’m not thrilled with the fact that I have to type sentence after sentence on my phone. If you give me a keyboard, hell I can type almost as fast as I can talk. But that little baby phone with my misclicks and misspellings is just not my most efficient way to communicate. I would waste so much time of my life if I carried out all conversations by texting on my phone.

The funny thing is I like to text. Instead of being stuck talking to the person, I can just leisurely communicate any way I choose. I am in control of the ebb and flow of text message. So why do I enjoy killing text convo’s so much? It’s a statement of control. The other person can be anxiously waiting for a response and they are at mercy if whether I respond or not. Now I’m well aware no one really, really, cares that much if I respond but I think it’s funny to just make them wait and see if I respond. I actually enjoy killing texts. Put me on death row because killing convo’s is one of my favorite pastimes.

After writing this the amount of texts I receive will probably drop to 0 because everyone will think I’m a complete douche but I obviously am exaggerating this to some degree for the effect of the post. From now on though, I’m changing my ways and will never let another text conversations die. I will never let the last text end on me for the rest of my life. So if I get one text from you at any point of either of our lives, you can expect to be the killer or else we are going to be in communication for a long, long time. I also know that what I usually do is wrong because I am basically slapping you in the face by not responding to texts that are asking for a question. Who would have thought a simple text message could have so much implication.