Facebook Follies

I’m going to give you my opinion on some facebook issues. Let’s face it, facebook has 500 million users, is the talk of the town in the investment world, and is going to be a leading player in social networking for years to come. Most of the baby boomers view facebook from the macro sense. They might create an account, get some friends and feel “in touch” with social networking. My generation, facebook was created while we were in college, uses facebook for invitations to events, constant status updates, messaging, chat and most of the bells and whistles. I’m not in tune with the younger high school crowd but I notice terrible spelling in their posts, pointless posts, farmville out the ass and other time wasters that I just don’t know. I do have my quips though and I’m going to use this post to share them.

The sick status updates
Evan and I talked about this one girl who would only post things like “feeling ill” or “don’t want to get out of bed” and it just got to the point that you are barely even my friend I’m not going to let you contaminate my news feed with your bad attitude. It just gets annoying and eventually leads to a de-friending which I only use as a last resort. Bad news isn’t facebook news worthy because you are just looking for sympathy that you aren’t going to get from me.

The constant updater
Oh so you just got a new pair of shoes. Oh you stepped in a puddle wearing your new shoes. Oh your socks got wet. Oh now you just bought new socks. Seriously, no one gives a shit about every moment of your life. I don’t mind when people post where they are or what they are doing because it lets your friends know where to find you but I don’t need to know every waking moment of your life. The mobile facebook app makes people feel the need to constantly be in touch with facebook. This is not needed.

The lonely wife poster
I’m at the age where some of my facebook friends are married and have kids. I however cannot stand seeing posts about their kids or how they have to stay home because of their kids. It wasn’t my life decision to get married, get knocked up and then spend my time at home because I have a little munchkin running around. I also don’t care that you need to post status updates because you are lonely and want to feel like you have friends out their in cyberspace who actually give a fuck about what you doing. We don’t. Yes, you made a terrible decision to get married and now you are forced to live in boredom. Don’t spread it to the entire facebook community.

The Secret Message Poster
I don’t understand this one. People post lyrics or lines from something that maybe one person might have any idea what they are talking about. If your update is only geared to one person, then send the fucking message to them. I’ll read your cryptic message and think “wow, that was really gay.” The people who post song lyrics get on my nerves too. I know the lyric. What am I supposed to do other than read your stupid lyric and assume you like this song. Is there hidden meaning behind “airplanes in the night sky?” No, save the lyric for your own head.

Here are some other examples of updates that should never have made it to facebook:
“rainboots on!” – NO!
“Everything has to do with everyone. Everything. Everyone. One.” – “POINTLESS!”
“I need to talk to you asap.” – It’s called a phone, not facebook
“I hate writing papers…” – We don’t feel sorry for your life decisions. No one cares.

I know I’m unusual and I have my own way of looking at things. I never put status updates unless it’s self promotion for my blog. I don’t feel it’s necessary to let people know where I am and what I’m doing in real time. I actually prefer people never know where I am. I find the tagging of pictures to be a nuisance because you can be in a blackout state and then find yourself in a disastrous situation that then gets shown to the entire facebook community. I do use facebook to find out about events, contact info, and stalking hot girls so it does have it’s uses. If you find yourself in one of the classes I described above there is no need to fret, a simple pointing out of your actions can make them easily correctable. Yes I am a facebook critic. I am also extremely conservative and anything that deviates from the norm is uncomfortable to me. I’m also a simpleton and find that the simpler things are, the better. These are only my opinions. If everyone was like me, we’d have routine but no innovation.