The City Of Brotherly Fuck You


The city of Philadelphia isn’t here to win friends. This city will rape your children, eat your food, spend your money and tell you that it is only raising taxes 1% this year. My gripes are probably minor but considering I work and live directly in the city, I feel all the effects of some of their bogus practices like the Water Revenue Department and PPA. A few other oddball questions pertain to the barely used Convention Center and who is getting rich off of the newly built stadiums paid for by the taxpayers? Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t want to be in any other city in the world but the citizens can only take so much before they revolt.

Let’s start with the Water Revenue Department. Our family has owned the same buildings in the city for over 150 years. There are 6 buildings that all occupy seemingly one building. However, according the the Water REVENUE Department, each building needs to be charged a storm water charge. A storm water charge is basically your sewer and they tax you by the building area. Each building gets a stormwater charge of 14 dollars a month. 14 x 6 = 84 x 12 months = $1008 a year. That isn’t even the water bill, just to pay for the use of a sewer. Oh and let’s not forget this little nugget, “To lessen the burden on customers who will see an increase in their bill, we are phasing in the new charge over a period of four years. Well isn’t that thoughtful! Our bill was 4 dollars a month for one building 4 years ago.

The PPA is so notorious they made a show about it called Parking Wars. An incident I saw today actually sparked this post. A man whose truck was too big to fit in a completely active and crowded parking lot parked along side the road to make a delivery of soda. While inside, a PPA agent cited him for being their for under 1 minute in a no park zone. The guy threw a fit when he came out and saw this a-hole speed writing him up to avoid confrontation. This city should be trying to promote commerce, not penalizing it. Our UPS driver routinely gets 5 tickets a day from the PPA. I wouldn’t park anywhere “for a few minutes” because there are 100 minions roaming the streets at all times. Let’s of course not forget the routine process where members of the traffic court give preferential treatment to their friends on a regular basis. It’s nice to see them being indicted.

I think we can all agree that Mayor Nutter has a much better reputation than the corrupt John Street. I do wonder though what the 700 million dollar expansion of the convention center did. I live in the city and rarely ever see anything other than the Auto show and Flower show being held there. I certainly don’t feel huge traffic from whatever shows are happening making me think nothing is. The convention center also feels sort of wasted. I suppose when tourists come it’s something to see but where are the fun things to do other than learn? Our stadium area is great but big businesses are profiting from that. I think the city needs to invest in something that people actually want to go to like a huge ass roller-coaster.

Just so I’m not completely bashing this city let’s jut make a list of things we’re known for and that are awesome: unruly sports fans, Reading Terminal Market, Love Park, Franklin Institute, Art and Barnes Museum, Xfinity Live, Kelly Drive, the Kimmel Center, Betsy Ross House, Broad St Run, Wing Bowl, John’s Roast Pork, Made in America last year, Rittenhouse, Philly Zoo, Sugarhouse and Camden Aquarium (ha).