5 Helpful Tips to Not Be an Idiot

No one wants to be an idiot but most people are, myself included.  It’s unavoidable because unless you are understanding time travel, curing cancer, or making other significant impacts on society, you are pretty much an idiot.  Wake up, work, sleep, and repeat.  What type of a person thinks doing this for 40 years is a great way of living?  Only an idiot.   With this macro understanding, it’s important for other humans not to be able to identify you as a moron from the micro viewpoint.  Meaning that when they talk to you, you must leave some doubt in their mind whether you are the next Einstein.

[dropcap background=”yes” color=”#333333″]”Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt”?[/dropcap]


5.  Confusion is your friend

ConfusedDogThe smartest people are the ones who can explain something in as few words and as simply as possible.  This is hard for a simpleton.   This is why it is important to disguise statements by throwing around a lot confusing lingo.  Using double negatives and obscure references is a good start.  We can’t not travel to Jupiter’s moon Euripides.  It requires thought to figure out a sentence like this.  Most people don’t like to think so they’ll ignore it if they don’t get it immediately.  Also, if it gets so confusing, many people may even mistake it for being advanced.

4.  Pick friends less or equally smart as you

2760-5456You always want to be the smartest person in the group.  This way less intelligent members can’t question your mistakes as easily.  If you are in a group of Harvard grads discussing a solution to a problem, they have already solved it by the time you even know it started.  There is no fun to this situation because you are always being over-minded and no one takes you seriously.  Why would Jerry be friends with George?  Ren with Stimpy?  Chandler with Joey?  You think this is by accident?  They knew what they were doing.

3.  Make Facts Up

RTJ_8231-EditOn Friday night we were by the Delaware river and Jeff said, “they named the state after it.”  I had no idea whether this was true or not but I agreed to it because that’s what people do when they don’t know whether something is true.  It’s simple to refute actual facts but much more challenging to find proper info on made up facts.  Not only are they hard to verify, but you get an edge up because, if you are good at creating them, there is no way the person you are talking to knows your made up fact.  Uh, the house was built in 1825 by General Custer…

2. yoYO     Ah’m Daa next $hAkEspEaR 

2f646b9cae5c3ae112b4d0fc44779243eaWriting like an uneducated person typically makes you look like an uneducated person.  I can’t think of one person who spells a word with 7 m’s that I thought was way over my head from an intellect standpoint.  This is one of those situations where if you don’t want people to judge you, don’t give them any ammunition.  It’s fairly obvious that no one expects a perfect sentence structure in a text message but some effort should be shown.

1.  Know you are idiot

a.aaa-Confused-monkeyThe best for last.  The only people who are truly stupid, are the ones who think they are smart.  It’s impossible to know about everything that people have verified as true let alone all the unknown mysteries the world has to offer.  The only time anyone would ever think you are dumb, is if you act smarter than you are.  Unless of course you really are just dumb and then it’s probably best to admit your dumb and that would be considered smart.  The only times I ever feel really dumb is when I talk like I know what I’m talking about.


By |2014-05-19T20:18:32-04:00May 19th, 2014|My Brain|0 Comments

Why Oh Why Aaron Hernandez?

Talk about a sleeper going to the wayside. It’s hard to call Hernandez a sleeper but I think that’s exactly what he is with Gronk injured for the rest of his life (he’s due back early on this season but we know that will never happen). Hernandez was mostly injured for the first part of last season but with Gronk out in weeks 11-16, he averaged 56 yards a game and had 3 TDs, not to mention 85 yards a game in 2 playoff games. He was a legitimate top 5 TE for the Patriots with Gronk constantly injured. My guess is Hernandez would have gone in the late 5-6 rounds and I would accept him on my team in a heartbeat. Guys who I’d rather have ahead of him would be Jimmy Graham, Jason Witten, Heath Miller, and Vernon Davis. Dennis Pitta and Brandon Myers would also be on that watch list. I honestly believed that Hernandez was going to be a fantasy stud with the Patriots discarding all of their WR’s and having him as a prime receiving target. The murder story on this poor sap is excruciatingly painful to read about.

USA Today – Prosecutors allege that Hernandez picked up Lloyd around 2:30 a.m. on June 17th and that they drove through Boston before heading back to North Attleborough. McCauley claimed that Hernandez was unhappy that Lloyd had spoken with people that he didn’t like at Boston nightclub several nights earlier. The prosecutor alleges that several people heard multiple gun shots near an industrial park close to Hernandez’s home around 3:23 a.m. and says that home surveillance cameras captured Hernandez carrying a semiautomatic firearm as he and two other men returned to his home at 3:30 a.m.

What a thug. This could be a case of some of the worst decision making known to man. He’s in the neighborhood of receiving 40 million dollars over 5 years for playing football and this is his course of action for taking care of someone for talking shit. Why can’t these guys just stay in their house with their wife and kids and watch Disney movies? The footage had to have been so plain and simple to see that he must know that he is dead to rights. You can tell in his expression that he knows he’s fucked. He doesn’t even look like he cares because they probably have so much evidence against him that he knows there’s now point of wasting emotional energy. How dumb do you have to be to leave a rental car under your name at the scene as well as dumping the body close to where you live? Talk about wasted talent. #TebowforTE

Aaron Hernandez

Boston has had a rough run this year.

Boston has had a rough run this year.

By |2013-06-26T21:55:51-04:00June 26th, 2013|Sports|0 Comments

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