First off, apologies for the last post, no one likes a downtrodden view on life as it disappoints everyone and I’m not special.

In the spirit of the holiday, I want to give my opinion on the holiday card…it’s stupid and self-serving. Why are you sending me a card of you? If you’ve done any homework on advertising, you should be sending me a holiday card of myself. If you learn nothing from my blog, which you shouldn’t be, learn that no one cares about anyone but themselves.

Funny cards are acceptable. It’s the thought that counts.

Here’s my beef after using that harsh intro to get the point across which obviously has gray area. Small brains stopped reading and would comment that I’m a scrooge, go fuck yourself, and I’m sorry I wasted $.46 cents. There are  2 reasons that I see people send cards:
1) Out of necessity – we are supposed to do this because our parents have done if for 30 years and we think it’s appropriate to keep the tradition
2) A misconception of what people do with these cards – to the people who send them, have you polled what people do with them and the effect they have?

We probably received 25 GENERIC cards from businesses at work and I threw everyone in the trash. Each one had the same message and a signature from the person sending them. I ask myself, is this to make me feel good or is it making themselves feel good that they are sending them? I certainly don’t care about their signature on a picture of Rudolph the Cancer Filled Reindeer.

You can’t complain about a practice without giving a solution so I’m glad you’re reading. I plan on implementing this practice tomorrow while I’m at work because it’s that important vs that shit stained method of sending out 100 messages to 100 of your fake acquaintances. Letters are dated but people still read emails. I’d suggest creating a personalized letter to each person in your life who means something to you. Family. Friends. People you work with. Write what actually means something to the person.

Here’s an example of a friend who isn’t on wouldn’t make my letter cut, but I’ll use it for example and humor sake.

Dear Rob Kelley,

It’s that time of year again when the Patriots will make their triumphant return to the Super Bowl. At least that’s what the bookmakers are saying at +240. Will they play the Eagles? Probably not. 10-1 is not happening with Foles at the helm. Hope to see you and Sam on the bowling alley to reinvigorate the long lost career of TB12. Keep practicing, the potential is there. 

Would I ever write that to Sam’s friend Rob? No. It’s pointing out the attention to detail of what I believe would make more of an impact. This can become a slippery slope. Read on.

These types of posts keep coming back to techniques which make me feel manipulative. I’ve written about it so many times at this point that it’s ingrained in my personality now. It’s a fine line between being genuine and going overboard. I personally would never do this in a manipulative sense. It’s not part of my make up. I’m not saying I couldn’t do it, I just wouldn’t do it. Here’s where the line wavers. If I go to the trouble of personalizing a note and fill it with “haven’t seen you in so long we have to get together… *puke*. I think they’d be more like “my life is going fine, sorry we don’t see each other much, I still think about blah blah blah, but that’s life.”

This advice isn’t phooey. It’s how I’ve gotten to where I am currently and why my life has worked the way it has. You can see the pitfalls though that come along with it. Something that I’ve struggled and pondered with many times. You HAVE to do it. Not in some bullshit letter but in every facet of life. It’s what breeds the difference between living your life and living your life. I don’t always do a good job with it. You go through phases of life. Sometimes you won’t be dialed in to various parts because of life events. Other times you’ll have breakthroughs which lead to new life opportunities. This is where Mindhunter left me thinking, then BoJack turned me downward about happiness, and now I’m trying to turn that upward and blast if off like a rocket ship.

I’ll close this long winded post with a message saying that no, I don’t hate you if you sent me a picture of your family. No I don’t think you’re a Holden Caulfield phony for going to the trouble of documenting your family by a photo and sending it to your friends and family. I’m sure this is what more normal people than myself do. I just wasn’t born with that feeling. I also probably did throw it in the trash.

Your age of stagnation is when you stop growing. For most, it’s when they get married, settle into a routine. You meet someone who loves you unconditionally and never challenges you or wants you to change, and then you never change.