Old age hit quick. I don’t even know where to begin. This weekend was a surprise party for Big Steve in Atlantic City. Sam and I drove up and got to Revel at around 3pm. We started drinking, surprised Steve, had some dinner, and then went out to the club. I have blurred lines of going out but I woke up in a different room sleeping in a chair which was unusual but everything seemed fine.
On Saturday morning I didn’t have any money and the ATM wasn’t accepting my card because of the magnetic strip. I left Revel at 9am and starting walking the Boardwalk in search of an ATM that accepted my card. I found one about 15 minutes away and I was back in business. I met up with the McGrath’s and started pre-gaming for the pool which was the plan from the get-go. Eating no food up to this point, I had a feeling that I wasn’t planning well for the afternoon and evening. I bought a 30 dollar drink and enjoyed the pool activities for a while. I napped and then lost a few more dollars before ending up in the room that I belonged in. At that point it was about 9pm and my life force was sapped. I decided that I couldn’t hang out for the night and I drove home. Before people start jumping to conclusions about my sobriety, I hadn’t had a drink for 6 hours so it was safe.
Although many factors contributed to me leaving, the main one was that if I partied for one more night, I would be putting myself in the face of danger. I hadn’t eaten properly. I had already lost money gambling and lord only knows what else could happen. It would have been toeing the line and I made a choice that although probably looked at as bizarre, made a lot of sense at the time. Perhaps this is maturing but it’s also getting beat down and quitting.
I was up early on Sunday and met up with the AOR crew and reminisced about past times. I then hung out with CK4 and Nikkii drinking a few beers and living the suburban life for a minute. JKash and Amber brought little, baby Jordan and we watched him for a while before checking out CK4’s new house a few miles away. As I departed the group, I was incredibly tired and had to go to sleep. I showered and fell asleep at 8pm.
I woke this morning a bit before 7am and still am not loving life. I used to be able to go out Thursday, Friday, and Saturday night and not feel the repercussions. I’ve dwindled down to a night and a half and then I’m toast. Some day I may wise up and quit this cycle but until then, these posts will continue to sum up mistakes.